“My” Time
Maybe you’ve had a week like this. On Monday we attended Tiffany’s induction into the world language National Honor Society. We had to hustle from there to pick up her clarinet, and I took her to her lesson. The next night was my regular Tuesday basketball game, but I had to leave early so I could attend the band concert at school. Both kids were playing in the Wind Ensemble. Wednesday evening, I picked up Tiffany from the pool and drove her to church for youth group and I stayed to work a little bit. Thursday, I dropped Jay off for band practice and then drove to one of our churches to make a presentation as part of their leadership training. And on Friday night we attended a celebration dinner for a colleague who had received a promotion.
Obviously, they were all worthwhile activities. I was there to support my kids. I fulfilled my professional responsibilities. And I said ‘thanks’ to a friend who had done his job well and helped me when I needed it. I don’t regret any of it. And yet, when my schedule gets booked like that I start to get on edge. I get tired and I start thinking, “What about me? When do I get a chance to relax?” Most of you reading this see only my public persona. You see the guy who is smiling and relaxed, kind, patient, tolerant, and willing to listen to just about anybody. What you don’t know about me is that I am, by nature, a selfish person. I like to have a little down time in my schedule when I can just kick back and not worry about being “Pastor Jim.” When my normal routine is interrupted, as it was during the week I described, I become a little antsy and a little self-absorbed and I start thinking about how inconsiderate it is of other people to intrude upon my life. I know that sounds bad. I’m not proud of it, but that’s who I am.
Fortunately, I’ve learned how to deal with my selfish streak. I’ve discovered that it’s all a matter of perspective. The first line of Rick Warren’s book, A Purpose-Driven Life, has made a huge difference for me. He wrote very simply, “It’s not about you.” And he’s right. My life isn’t all about me. There are people in my life that I love and care about, and I have a responsibility to them. Sometimes I need to set aside my routine to give them what they need from me. I mean, that’s what family, that’s what relationships are all about – being there for those you love. I also have the privilege of serving a wonderful group of people like you. And sometimes that service requires me to sacrifice some of “my” time because someone else needs it more than I do. And that’s okay. That’s what I’ve been called to do.
I don’t have weeks like the one I described in my introduction as often as I used to, but they still happen occasionally. Whenever I find myself starting to get on edge, I recite the words of Paul. “Whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus.” That verse helps me keep things in perspective. It’s really not about me. Whatever I’m doing – whether it’s as a grandparent, friend, or pastor – I’m doing it all for him…